32 Min

Listen as Lindsey Steffen, LMHC, and Tova Kreps, LCSW, talk about love.

Men in the Church

June is Men’s Health Month. We will be focusing on the mental health of men during this month.

Men and The Church

Most Protestant and Catholic Churches are led by men, but most volunteers and employees of churches are women. Studies show that churches are predominately attended by females (Stone, 2019). A commonly shared statistic is when a mother comes to Christ, her family will join her at church only 17% of the time; but when a father comes to Christ, his family joins him 93% of the time (WACMM, n.d.). Does this mean that the Church needs men? Yes, but more importantly do men need church?

Why is the church good for men?

Men become more engaged husbands and fathers when they attend church (Becker & Hofmeister, 2001). Church engagement is proven to lead to marital stability and happiness in life (Fagan, 1996). Moreover, people who attend church (including men!) are more likely to move out of poverty, have better self-esteem, and increased marital and family happiness (Fagan, 1996). Teenage children admire their religious fathers and enjoy the time they spend with them ((Becker & Hofmeister, 2001).

What is unappealing to men about church?

Unappealing elements of church life for men may be challenging to identify, but we can consider some science. Men are purportedly more analytical or concrete in their understanding of faith and their relationship with Jesus. Some men refer to contemporary services as “touchy-feely” or “kumbaya”. Taking this to a scientific level, a research study imaging the brains of nearly 1,000 adolescents revealed male brains had more connections within their right and left hemispheres, whereas female brains were more connected across the right and left hemispheres. Male brains may be optimized for motor skills (movement/activity), and female brains may be optimized for combining analytical and intuitive thinking (social/empathy), and yet everyone has elements of both that can be developed over time (Lewis, 2013). Perhaps churches are not always meeting the male brain’s inclinations toward movement (projects/activities) as much as the female brain (socials/small groups).

Is attending church for men perceived as a sign of weakness?

For men, it is also important to know weakness and struggles are a sign of strength. In 1 Corinthians 12:9-11, Paul counted his weakness as an opportunity for God’s grace and power to shine in his life. If you are on staff at a church, consider the male representation on your platform on Sunday; show the men in your congregation how a real man worships, reads the Bible, speaks about his vulnerabilities, and shares his testimony about how God’s strength works through him.

How can men be encouraged in churches?

  • If you are a man reading this today, we challenge you to get plugged in and lean into a local church body.

  • If you are a pastor or staff/lay leader at your church, we encourage you to consider the men in your congregation and begin having discussions about to serve the men in your care better including work projects where they can serve together or activities where they can play together.

  • If you are a spouse to a man who is hesitant to go to church, continue to pray for him. Ask God to open his heart to his Heavenly Father.

Dr. Leigh Byers

Executive Director

Join Co-Founder Tova Kreps, LCSW and Pastor Kevin Fischer of Miami Vineyard as they discuss men’s issues and how they relate to being involved in church.

PRESENTED BY

Carol Valdivia-Bressan

Therapist, Registered Mental Health Counselor Intern

BIO

  • Some facts / interests, etc.: 
    • Carol has been married since 2023 and enjoys paddle boarding, spoken word, and hiking.
  • Languages Spoken: English/Spanish

Christine Schlottman

Co-founder of Wellspring Counseling, Therapist, Licensed Mental Health Counselor

BIO

  • Some facts / interests, etc.: 
    • Christine is one of the co-founders of Wellspring Counseling. She is a speaker and international missionary; She is married with 3 adult children and 3 grandchildren.
  • Languages Spoken: English

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