Whether it’s because of our own pride, a desire to be perfect, or a fear of rejection, owning up to our flaws is hard. Repentance is an essential life skill to have, so let’s walk through the importance of repentance and give you some steps you can teach your kids, yourself, and others on making amends.
Created by the Institute for Christian Conciliation (ICC), the 5A’s are a step-by-step guide to repentance. The 5A’s are as follows:
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Admit what I did wrong. “I admit I was wrong when I (specific offense).”
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Apologize for how my choice affected you. “I am sorry for (describe effect on another) .”
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Accept the consequences. “I accept that I need to (state consequences to you) .”
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Alter (change) my choice in the future. “Next time I will (state intent for new behavior) .”
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Ask forgiveness. “Will you forgive me?” (Wait for an answer.)
Why Repentance Is Important
The unwillingness to repent for sins we commit against others and the pain we cause them as a result is often the reason that many relationships fall apart. If someone, for instance, has repeatedly hurt their family by cheating on their spouse without remorse, they will be doubly-judged for not owning up to their actions and for cheating.
Unrepentance is also self-destructive, because it often blocks you from receiving love from others. In the worst case scenario, the offense is never forgotten and the people you hurt may start to resent you, making reconciliation even harder.
Unchaining Love
Repentance is an essential life skill and something God repeatedly calls Christians to throughout the Bible. It will never be easy, but it will help us live our lives with unrestrained love that is not tainted by our flaws and failings with others.
Listen to this week’s podcast entitled: Unchaining Love, Part 1: Repentance
Host: Lindsey Steffen, LMHC with Tova Kreps, LCSW
