We have a widespread epidemic of bullying in our nation and around the world. Bullying is unwanted, aggressive behavior among school-aged children. Kids who bully often use an imbalance of power such as physical strength, access to embarrassing information, or popularity. Bullying includes spreading rumors, making threats, attacking someone verbally or physically, and/or excluding someone from a group on purpose.
According to the website “Stomp Out Bullying,” one out of five kids admit to being a bully or doing some bullying. The School Psychology Review magazine cites that approximately 70% of young people and staff have seen bullying occur in their school.
Bystanders are kids who do one of four things: 1) join in on the bullying after it’s started, 2) be an audience by laughing or encouraging the bullying, 3) remain distant from the bullying by not participating but also not standing up to the bully, or 4) defend the child who is being bullied.
The bystanders are the key to preventing bullying or at least stopping it before it gets out of hand. Kids who are bullied can experience negative mental health, physical, and academic issues. They are more likely to experience depression and anxiety which can persist into adulthood, health complaints, and decreased academic achievement. They are more likely to skip, miss or drop out of school altogether.
Most parents are concerned about this growing problem in our nation and around the world, but aren’t sure what they can do to help. Here are some ways that you can encourage your child to resist bullying.
BULLYING TEACH YOUR KIDS THAT THEY ARE MADE IN GOD’S IMAGE
We respect and honor everyone even if they are different than we are. This begins with how we show respect and honor to one another in the home.
CULTIVATE KINDNESS IN THE HOME
Speak to your spouse and children with love, kindness, and patience. Kids learn how to speak to others by imitating what they learn at home.
MODEL REPENTANCE AND FORGIVENESS
Teach your children to be the first to apologize and the first to forgive. Taking ownership of one’s wrongdoings and giving up the right to revenge are some of the most powerful tools that you can teach your child.
PRAY
Pray for your kids. Model for your children what it looks like to ask God to search your heart for any wrongdoing and then confess those sins to God.
PRACTICE SELF-CARE
Recognize and understand when you as a parent need to get your own help, whether that be from a trusted friend, a pastor, or a professional counselor. Break the cycle of past hurt and trauma by getting the help you need so that you can parent your kids from an emotionally healthy place.
By Beth Assis, Registered Mental Health Counselor
